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  • My New Year's Resolutions

    I'm doing pretty well on those of '06. Other than getting a passport and reading The Iliad (although I do have a copy in my possession; yay, me!)

    So why not take a stab at new ones? And, no, I won't be vowing to quit smoking. Too cliche.

    Especially now that I've learned that the one-itis and my brand new LJBF (as far as I know, as we're still working out parameters; I totally hit the ASD after I made her break her no kissing on the first date rule...so, yes, LJBF; even if she keeps denying it. fuck yeah, I'm working the FB angle, as PM Dawn said, ''what would you do in my position?") smoke. I discovered this about my new friend whilst we spent the afternoon knocking back beers and shooting pool this afternoon. I also learned that our birthdays are 2 days (and 4 years) apart and that she also likes Kelly Clarkson's Since U Been Gone. Anyway, we'll see what happens, likely nothing good...I slipped up and complimented her. Although it was honest. But we split the tab, so I haven't Gone completely AFC yet. Or, should I say, reverted to AFC yet. And a 3rd outing is apparently fine. Whatever. The Mavericks and the Suns tip off in 12 minutes. I have another woman to call sometime this evening, who has suggested drinks, and a 3rd is due back from Vacation soon. However, since I like this one best (what can I say? she's cute and has a nice rack; kicked my goofy ass at pool, too)...I'm fucked. The proverbial six ways from (Song of the Day: Extreme- Seven) Sunday (s in a row). She told me to call her, I know, I'm totally letting her lead. Like I said, just working my way back from a really deep pit of wearing my self-loathing as a badge of pride. And yes, I realize I should've told her to call me; the best I had was ''answer''. Baby steps. And I AM tipsy. Fucking lightweight what I am. Anyway, I keep making all kinds of mistakes. But now I realize what they are. And no, I haven't stooped to being her emotional tampon yet. Nor will I.

    But I digress. Skid Row on the stereo. Visions of Nash to Marion dancing through my pretty little head. The list:

     

    1) stay the fuck out my own way- this will solve all my sticking points as best as I'm able

     

    2) stop over-analyzing everything, just Be Here Now (possibly my next tat)- channel my inner Captain Caveman; no think, just be, just DO

     

    That's it. That's all. All stems from those 2 things. Oh, I'll probably smoke MORE again this year and try to better deal with the inadequacies of others, but those are the big ones. Best of luck to y'all with yourn resolutions. I'm kinda sad today. No, not because of that. I've met the one, D's not her. Because 23 years ago yesterday, I lost my favorite uncle to a car accident. Christmas has kinda sucked ever since. Although this year's (especially the promise of mine divorce) been pretty solid. Almost enough to make me reframe. But not quite. Not yet. More work to be done. Oh, I'll call her: make the ho say no, n'est pas? Besides, she's on Vacation until the 8th, which meshes nicely with mine own schedule of dilettantism. And I did do some things correctly. I polished up my palm reading bit. I ran a variation on Mystery's photo routine (to get her comfortable with me taking digital pictures of her). And I hugged her like I meant it (even if I forgot to smell her hair; again). Cracked her back, too. Sometimes I don't know mine own strength. Didn't offer to pay for everything. She was there before me. She paid for pool. Yes, I still need to work on frequent and early casual touching and eye contact, but I have to begin somewhere. Let's just say that she has definite pivot potential, and, at this juncture (Santa brought me a vocabulary for xmas); that's Good Enough.

     

    All right, game time and I need a shower. Gots to wash the failure (it's not failure, it's feedback) off'n me. I received a can you come into work tonight-type plea whilst out and about, which I'm ducking. Even though it's straight OT. Just because I'm in no shape to drive (aren't I responsible, though?), don't feel like taking the bus, and REALLY need a nap. As y'all can tell by my rambling. Peace.

  • Merry freakin' Xmas, y'all

    Heartfelt condolences to the family, friends and fans of James Brown, who passed earlier this morning. He will be missed. Why couldn't it have been Sean Paul, instead? That fucking poseur. Song of the Day: J.B.- Living in America, from the Rocky IV soundtrack. It's always been a guilty pleasure o' mine. Anyway, the incongruence of tragic amidst the joy of the day prompted me to make with the posting, which I hadn't intended to do.

     

    Anyway, I hope that you haven't done any permanent damage to your friends and family YET, I know how pleasant family get-togethers can be. Especially as someone who rarely attends them and always gets to hear the dreaded ''so, when are you going to get a GF, settle down and all the rest of it?''-type queries. Although not quite so much since I got married on the first date in Las Vegas to a complete stranger. The lengths I go to to avoid dealing with such questions. Mine family was here briefly on Saturday, on their way to visit relatives and will be back on Wednesday on their way home. So I'm doing just fine. And I'm DAMN glad that I called some friends I haven't been close enough with of late just to wish them well. Fuck all y'all, that's how I roll.

    And then I spent my xmas (I only really observe the Eve) watching football all day. Fucking Seahawks! How how HOW the fuck do you leave someone THAT wide open that late in the game? Whatever, backing into the playoffs still gets you there. And how about them Colts?

    Oh yeah, and I also did the annual viewing of It's A Wonderful Life. Yes, I again misted up at the end. Just like I always do. Just like I always will. Nope, don't care who knows it. I've recently come across 2 women who've never seen this film (I mean, you hear talk, but you never expect to actually meet such a mythical creature, like a unicorn; and I've met TWO! this month), one of whom I convinced to peruse it last night. And yes, I'll be quizzing her later. Since she's been testing me (and y'all know what that means) and all. And to deal with my Inner Game issues regarding her, I went and got me another woman's digits. Next. But this one intrigues me. Seems like fun, too. Which means I can stop over-analyzing and just work on my Be Here Now (New Year's Resolution #1).

     

    So I'm listening to My Chemical Romance's The Black Parade in the wee smalls of today (My Sister gave it to me, haven't listened to anything other than the kickass title track), and it's pretty good. Nope, never really been a fan. Nope, never really heard much of their work. But several of the tunes totally sound like as though I've been listening to them for years. Which is either pretty Cool or kinda derivative-like. I haven't decided yet.

     

    I read a variation on this somewhere: Okay, I'd like it read into the record that I've made the obligatory ''come back to my place''-type advances and you've made the appropriate ''no, it's too soon''-type demurrals in return. That way, we can skip all the bullshit and just get on with the fun.

     

    Oh woe is Superman (I watched Superman Returns the other day- Spacey is an excellent Lex Luthor; Bosworth's hot, even if her tits are too small; and I still love Parker Posey, maybe I'll watch Party Girl later). He shoots in a chick's mouth (what? it's xmas, chicks give head; they should give head all year...but especially now), he could blow the back of her head clean off. And NO woman's worth doing time over. Hell, half of them ain't even worth spending time WITH.

     

    Anyway, enjoy your holidays, y'all. Be good and be safe, I need the traffic. Buy me something shiny tomorrow. I'm totally worth it. I'm off to check out Hinder's My Space page. I've been hearing a lot of good things about the band and the page itself of late (especially the fan catfight portion of proceedings...nope, not gonna give it away, check it out yourself), and it's time to see for my ownself. It seems that they're channelling the spirit of the '80's hair bands and are all about the music, the intoxicants and the groupies. Good Times. Maybe I'll check out their upcoming concert hereabouts. Fuck yeah, by myself (I'm confident enough to go to shows alone, which means I can go to MORE; and meet more folks). It's at the U of C. This means hot coeds. We like hot coeds. And they deserve the opportunity to like ME. I vaguely remember how stressful school can be, and I'm a spectacular stress reliever. On all sorts of levels.

    Unless I'm fucking someone on the steady and regular tip by then (I have a few things going). Then maybe I'll reward her by taking her with me as social proof. Y'all know how competitive women can be. Well, now you do. Use it at your discretion. Peace.

     

    Oh yeah, and how does having some other guy pay for my divorce so he can marry my leftovers make ME a dumb fuck (the name I was called)? Not really feeling it. Not really my crisis. Best of luck to them both, as I've a sneaking suspicion they'll need it. Besides, I'm just waiting until my 11 year old stepdaughter I've never met turns 18. She's gonna be a heartbreaker. The 17 year old's all right, too. Ah, NOW it feels like Christmas.

  • Having myself a merry little...

    ...y'all know the motherfucking rest.

     

    Okay, as if meeting me a nice new friend this Yuletide season wasn't enough (it kinda IS), this a.m. at roughly 2:15, whilst I was at work; I received a call from Texas. You know, wherefore the ex-wife (okay, technically, we're still married, but for all intents and purposes) resides.

    When I saw the number on my call display, I figured she was merely drunk dialling me. Yeah, I get that a lot. Especially now. Then, knowing how she's always been about the high road, I thought maybe I'd get to listen to her getting plowed by some sweaty Mexican until the machine cut off. But no...

    It was her new boyfriend (good for her, better for, you know, ME) telling me that she wants a divorce like now. Okay, fine, how is this MY crisis? I paid for the wedding, the divorce is on her. Or, as it stands, them. Anyway, apparently they'll be taking care of it. And then buddy made with the obligatory, if somewhat halfhearted, namecalling. Just to prove beyond any shadow of a doubt just who really is the alpha here. Yeah, some guys still do that. And that's why they're beta.

    Anyway, bottom line: I'm free...free...FREE!!!!! Or soon will be. Yay, me! And a merry xmas it shall be.

     

    Cover of the Day: Gene Simmons- When You Wish Upon a Star. Just because.

     

    I hope today proceeds as smoothly for the rest of y'all. Although, really, how could it possibly? I'm pondering calling in sick to work tonight and celebrating, but I don't want to jinx things, so I'll wait until I actually see some documentation. However, since this is the first good news I've heard on the annulment front (and the first I've heard from her since last November), things are definitely looking up.